


Not a Lost Cause

by TuckerPuppy (HarleyD)



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Anal, Angst, Blushing Daryl, Bottom Daryl, Clueless Rick, Daryl Whump, Hurt/Comfort, I could write that tag all day, Jesus flirting with Daryl, Jesus is insightful, M/M, Mostly in fun, Nervous Daryl, No cheating, Okay Okay Rickyl and richonne can exist together in my world, Oral Sex, Richonne in the background, Rickyl, Slow Burn Daryl Dixon/Rick Grimes, Temporarily Unrequited Love, Trouble Causing Jesus, m/f sex not described or depicted, not a deal breaker for Rickyl
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-29
Updated: 2016-05-01
Packaged: 2018-05-23 23:53:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6134371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HarleyD/pseuds/TuckerPuppy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Daryl realized a long time ago that his feelings for Rick were a little more than brotherly, but has spent their time together making sure those thoughts don't ever surface, sure that it wasn't worth the risk.  He'd done a pretty good job of it too, until a certain blued eye fella named Jesus showed up and seemed to be able to read Daryl's every thought, and wasn't shy about pointing it out.  Not that it matters, Rick picked Michonne anyways and there was no way around that.  Right?  Rickyl, top rick, bottom Daryl, some background Richonne, since I'm pretty sure that can exist with Rickyl, Daryl is gonna be miserable for a bit though (maybe a bit more than a bit).  Angst, unrequited love for a bit (or at least as far as Daryl knows) a slow burn.  Why? I mean this was supposed to be a one shot but turned into... something else.  Picks up from when they brought Jesus back to Alexandria and will do whatever its gonna do since I have no idea what canon is gonna do :D</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

            Daryl was aware of the new guy watching him as he checked his guns, getting two packs together for the trip to the hilltop. He made his and Rick’s identical, the same food, ammo in the same place. If they ever had to go in each other’s bags they knew exactly where everything was, and saving that few seconds could mean life or death.

            The eyes were on him as he did it though, and he was doing his very best to ignore him. So intent on it that he didn’t realize it was just the two of them in the room until everyone else was long gone. He glanced around, feeling uneasy, but knew that there was a lot to do and not everyone would hang around talking forever. He knew Rick trusted him to make his pack, so it wasn’t like he would stay and baby sit him with it.

            “Why don’t you like me?”

            Daryl grunted and glanced up for a moment, those eyes staring at him, before going back to his task.

            “Is it because of the truck?”

            “We needed that stuff.” He answered automatically but there was no heat behind it. He had been pissed but he had taken that in stride, they would find more. They always did.

            “Is it because I escaped when you were supposed to be guarding me?”

            Daryl couldn’t help it as his head snapped up, sure the surprise showed on his face before he covered it up. The fact that he had done such a terrible job, the fact that his inability to watch one person could have gotten Rick killed tore up his gut. That was one of the only things he could do well, the best service he could give Rick and these people, and this man had escaped easily.

            When he had stood on those stairs with his gun pointed with the others, and Rick had met his eyes it had felt like the world crashed down around him. He let him down.

            “Ah, that is it, isn’t it?”

            “You don’t know what yer talkin’ about.”

            He moved closer, almost within touching distance and Daryl tensed. “It really isn’t your fault, I’m pretty good at escaping.”

            “We shoulda just left you there.”

            “Didn’t Rick say that you were the one that was trying to convince him to look for new people? Doesn’t sound to me like someone that would leave someone out there to die.”

            It took a few moments to register and Daryl frowned down at the bag, “You were awake.”

            “For some of it.”

            “Doesn’t mean you know me.”

            “With how the two of you looked out there, I gotta say, I was pretty surprised when I got back to your camp.”

            A small thrill of pride wound up in Daryl and he did look up to finally full meet his eyes, “A bit nicer than you was expecting?”

            “Well that too. Mostly I meant it wasn’t Michonne I expected to find in Rick’s bed.”

            The words jolted Daryl like a physical blow and his head whipped up, looking around the room, making sure no one else was there to hear it. The blush was already working up his face and he knew there was nothing he could do to stop it, nothing he could do to hide it without being too obvious.

            “It ain’t like that.”

            “I see that now.” Jesus edged a little closer, “Though I don’t think that is from a lack of wanting it to be like that. At least not on your part.”

            “I got work to do.” Daryl didn’t like the way the words choked out, and wished he had put a little bit more denial into that somewhere.

            “Right. Making yours and Rick’s packs.”

            Daryl threw down the stuff in his hands, nervousness and frustration turning into anger. “Listen, I don’t know what yer tryin’ to do, but it aint gonna work. Even if you weren’t full of shit it isn’t like anyone would care.”

            “How long have you known Rick now? Years?” He reached out to touch Daryl’s arm and he jerked away, trying to read the man’s face. It wasn’t a smirk, it wasn’t hostile it was more… empathetic.

            “None of your business.”

            “So I have this theory that you hate me because you already know you lost your place in his bed, and all you got left is your place at his side.” Daryl wasn’t moving and Jesus was nearly touching him, “But I saw the way he looks at you too, and I don’t think you’ve lost your chance at either of them.”

            Daryl had to swallow down hard, a lump in his throat. Jesus tilted his head, like he had that first time they met, trying to catch his eyes but Daryl looked away. He was fighting off tears and where the hell had they came from. His voice was gruff. “Back up.”

            Jesus nodded, doing as he was asked and putting his hands up like he was showing Daryl that he was harmless. “Just telling you what I saw. Years is a long time to pine for something that you can’t have.”

            Daryl had a response on the tip of his tongue when there was a noise behind him, Rick calling out to someone before he headed into the room. “Hey Daryl do you know where…” He seemed to notice Daryl’s tense body language and the way Jesus took another quick few steps back and he straightened. “Daryl?”

            The tone had changed, a question in the words and despite that he knew what Jesus would think he turned fully to face Rick, “S’okay. Just chattin’ with our new _friend.”_

            They shared a look and when Rick looked at Jesus his face was harder, even as he moved up to shoulder against Daryl, always a united force.   It made Jesus grin, which wasn’t what Rick was expecting and he glanced at Daryl who was looking away. He looked at Daryl for a few seconds, wondering what had gotten into him before looking back to Jesus, “Good. Cause I know you aren’t here in my town starting trouble with my people.”

            “Of course not.”

            Rick eyed him for a minute longer before turning his gaze back to Daryl, a quick up and down assessment like he was making sure that nothing was wrong and he gave a tight nod. “We’re getting ready to wrap up, do you know where the tools for the car ended up? The engine needs to be looked at before we go, and I thought you last had it working on your new bike.”

            “I’ll take care of it.” Daryl hesitated and grabbed the bags, shoving them at Rick, “These are all set. I’ll get the tools and see you at the RV.”

            “Thanks Daryl.” A warm smile was sent his way, Rick not at all put off when he got a scowl in response, if anything it made him smile more. It faded when he looked at Jesus though, “Come on, I have a few more questions before we go.”

            Daryl stepped back to let Jesus follow Rick and shoved down the jealousy. He knew where his place was with Rick, no one had been able to shake that. And he didn’t have the answers Jesus would have, so it had to be the other man.

            “You got it.” Jesus had almost reached the door and hesitated before turning to Daryl, waiting until Rick was far enough ahead that he wouldn’t hear. “It’s not a lost cause.”

            With that he took off after Rick, leaving Daryl to go find the tools and work on the car, just like he had told Rick he would. It was dumb to even be worked up about it, he knew his feelings, and he knew Rick’s and it had been a long time since he was insecure about his place with them. He wouldn’t let some guy that just rolled in make him feel any different.

            The words did something though, some small part of him that he had violently shut down and refused to acknowledge was suddenly sitting up and asking for attention. A small shimmer of something that might have been hope, but he shook his head to clear it. Rick was with Michonne, they made the perfect pair. Alpha male and Alpha female, the leaders of their little group and Daryl wouldn’t have it any other way. Really. He wouldn’t.

            If he repeated it enough times he might believe it.


	2. Chapter 2

            Daryl leaned his hip against the front of the RV, eyeing the engine.  It looked to be in pretty good shape, he tightened this and tapped that, but really he was just killing time until they left.  From where he was he had a good view of Rick, watching him talk to Carl, and he was startled when someone came up behind him.

            He was too controlled to jump, his only acknowledgement of the doctor behind him a small grunt.  “What do you want?”

            At first there was no answer, just a bag tapped against his side.  He took the hint, tearing his eyes away from Rick to look at her. 

            She smiled at him, “Here, homemade oat cake. Complex carbohydrates, omega 3s.”

            Daryl eyed it before glancing up at her face, uncomfortable with the friendly gesture.  He was used to Alexandria, to living somewhere where they were a _community_ , but he still wasn’t used to anything like this.

            “Nah, I’m good.  Gonna make a pit stop, I’ll pick up something then.”

            “Like... rabies?”  Her tone was teasing, and Daryl was surprised when it didn’t make his hackles rise, it actually made him almost smile before he forced it down and went back to what he was doing.

            She was still there though, “Is this because I tried to get you that stuff?”  He leaned back for a moment, catching Rick out of the corner of his eye and watched him pace around with Judith.  Something in his stomach clenched at that, and it made him forget where he was for a second.

            “Yea.”  Her tone had dropped to a soothing sound, almost sad and when he looked back to her she clearly knew exactly who he had been looking at.  “And you remind me of someone I used to know.”  She gave him a pointed look and just to break it up he reached for the bag.

            “Hope it taste better than it looks, cause it looks like shit.”  At one point his words would have offended her, but he found a good humor tone had slipped through his words and instead she smiled at him.

            “Shit is better than road kill.”  Her eyes drifted towards Rick again and she met Daryl’s eyes for a second before looking away.  “Right. Anyway, just eat it.”  She reached up like she was going to touch his arm but thought better of it, shooting him one more sad smile before heading back to her house.  He watched her go, Tara was waiting for her and they easily moved in to each other’s arms and he was suddenly uncomfortable.

            Everything in the vehicle was done, but he stayed by it, watching Jesus leave the house at Michonne’s side and desperation wound around his insides, he felt like he was being replaced.

            They were all loading on, Jesus one of the first and Daryl finished what he was doing heading for the door.  He was to it when he saw Rick and he held back, letting the other man go first, ducking his head when Rick glanced his way so he couldn’t see his face.  He knew the other man could read him like a book and they had other things to worry about at the moment.

            Inside the RV Michonne took the front seat next to Rick and Daryl was used to that.  However when he went to slip into the seat just behind her, where he could see the road and discuss with Rick what was happening he came up short.  Jesus was already there and it made sense, he had to give directions, he had to be at Rick’s right hand if anything happened so Daryl ducked his head and slid into one of the bench seats, keeping his eyes out the window.

            The RV started to rumble along and he was content staying right where he was, when his foot was nudged.  He looked up, expecting it to be Glenn or Maggie and felt the glare slide over his face when instead Jesus’ eyes were on him.  It was too close of quarters to talk, to say anything, and Daryl hoped the other man wasn’t dumb enough to say something here. 

            Without meaning to his eyes darted from Jesus up to the front, focusing on Rick’s hand on Michonne’s leg and he didn’t realize he made a sound until Abraham spoke up.

            “You okay?”

            “What?”

            Abraham had been talking to Glenn but now he was looking at Daryl, a strange look on his face.  “You uh... you made a sound.  You hurt?”

            “I’m fine.”  He could feel Rick’s eyes on him in the rearview mirror, he didn’t even have to look to know but he stared resolutely out the window, refusing to acknowledge him.

            He was doing a poor job of keeping lookout, staring blankly out the window when the RV started to slow down.  Immediately he looked to Rick, “Rick, what’s going on?”

            He stood up and out the front window he could see the wrecked vehicle, it looked like it had just happen and he was idly aware of Jesus having some kind of shit fit about it.

            They pulled up and piled out of the RV, hands slipping to their guns as they glanced around.  It wasn’t exactly clear what had happened and when Rick pulled a gun on Jesus even though Daryl wasn’t sure what he was saying he moved quickly to his side, just in time to hear Jesus ask for a gun.

            He shook his head, not needing to check with Rick, “No.”  His mind was already on the ground though and he pointed, “We got tracks, heading this way.”

            Jesus tried to take off towards the building he pointed at immediately, and even though there was panic on his face Daryl couldn’t help but add, “How do we know this aint firecrackers?”  He had already been fooled once... twice... by this man and he wouldn’t fall for it a third time.

            “You don’t.”

            Daryl licked his lips and looked to Rick to wait to see what he would say.  He’d like to leave him out here and his people if they were in there, but something tightened in his gut at the thought.  Rick met his eyes and they exchanged thoughts and Rick nodded before looking to Jesus, “We’ll get your people.  You’re staying here with one of us.”

            He looked like he might argue but Michonne was at his side instantly, and at the moment Daryl couldn’t even care, not when the stakes were so high.  “That’s the deal.” 

            Without having to be asked Maggie nodded towards him, “I’ll stay out here.”  Leaving one person with him was a risk but Maggie could take care of herself, and it was probably safer out here with him than it was in the house.  “Just be careful.”

            Rick gave her a grim smile, but one that didn’t waver.  “We will be careful.”

            “Please, hurry.”  Jesus sounded truly panicked and Daryl felt that waver again, but he pushed it aside.  It wasn’t his call and he’d follow whatever Rick said.

            “If you hear me whistle, shoot him.”

            “I will.”  There wasn’t a person there that didn’t believe Maggie when she said it too.

            They all headed in, Rick taking the lead, and Daryl watched the perimeter as they all marched in, sending one last glance around, desperate that if there was any danger coming he would see it.  Everything looked clear and Jesus wasn’t even looking at them, just staring as far as he could into the building, and he followed Glenn in.

 

            They split up as they moved into the building, and if there was a fleeting moment of jealousy when Michonne went with Rick and he went with Glenn, he pushed it down.  It wasn’t the time for it, and it had never come up as an issue before.  He concentrated on what he was doing, letting Glenn lead as he kept an eye out for walkers.  The few they ran in to were dispatched with easy enough and he was on auto drive as they cleared the place, keeping an eye on any oncoming danger while they wrangled up all of Jesus’ people.

            He stayed toward the back when they exited the building, watching them greet Jesus and the joy that came afterwards with little interest.  If they fought that badly they shouldn’t even be out here.  They were like sitting ducks.  His casual glance ended on Rick, and like he felt it the other man looked up at him, giving him a half smile and he had to fight not to grin like an idiot back.  He needed to look tough, needed to _be_ tough. 

            After everyone else had gotten on the RV he climbed on, doing a cursory check of what was around them, of where everyone was on the RV.  It was almost like when he was out hunting, taking note of where everyone, predators and prey, were.  He met Jesus’ eyes and the man nodded at him and he ignored it, sliding into his seat.  Rick was in the back, talking to Glenn and Maggie, and Daryl watched him until he headed back towards the front, sliding his eyes to look out the window.  Keeping watch.

            A hand landed on his shoulder and he looked up to Rick, unable to help returning his smile as the man squeezed the shoulder under his hand before heading towards the front.  Sometimes it was like that when Rick touched him, it made it harder to... to remain stoic. Rick moved on, took his seat as the driver and Daryl forced himself to settle back and relax.  He felt better about the trip, he still didn’t trust them but now they owed them.  And that was valuable.


End file.
